Little Folk

Wonderful. Winged little folk are my favourite! They're just so beautiful once you get them properly framed and mounted. Anyway, back to the matter at hand. This next step will require you to get a little closer to your captive. Be careful! It's likely to be a little annoyed at being kept prisoner, and it might take the opportunity to spit or kick or try to gouge your eyes out. Stay safe while you get a closer look, and then tell me - what colour are its eyes?\n\n[[Bright green.]]\n\n[[Any other colour but green.]]

<center>A Primer On The Capture And Identification Of The Little Folk Of Myth And Legend</center>\n\nSo you've captured one of the little folk of myth and legend, have you? Excellent work! This handy chart will help you identify your find, and also recommend the best way to profit from it!\n\nLet's dive right in, shall we? First of all - how big is the mythical creature you're trying to identify?\n\n[[About the size of a child.]]\n\n[[About as tall as my arm is long.]]\n\n[[About as tall as the span of my hand.]]

Good show - you've found a URISK (also known as a BROWNIE, a BRUNAIDH, a DOMOVOI, a TOMTE or a GRUAGACH). These helpful spirits dwell in old houses, or near old farms, and are happy to help out in exchange for food and gifts. Let it go and get into the habit of leaving some food out for it at night - cat food or kibble should do the trick. Before long you'll never have to fold socks or wash dishes again. Alternatively, take it to a dealer and sell the bugger - wealthy families will pay top dollar for an urisk to call their own.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

More than likely it's a MENEHUNE then. These shy and retiring little buggers live deep in the forests of the Hawaiian Islands, and are partial to the taste of bananas. Go on, give it a try. Poke one through the bars of its cage (or wherever you're keeping it) and watch the little fella go crazy. Menehune are said to be incredible craftspeople, so once you've got it adequately subdued, give it some tools and see what it can come up with!\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Hmm. A benevolent creature. Okay. Can you sneak a closer look at it? Does it happen to have pointy ears?\n\n[[Why, yes it does!]]\n\n[[Nope. Round ears. How boring.]]

<center>Author Note</center>\n\nWhilst researching pixies for my short story, "<a href="https://thepigeonhole.com/books/fable">Blue</a>", I stumbled across an ancient-looking field guide at the back of a local bookshop. It was called A Primer On The Capture And Identification Of The Little Folk Of Myth And Legend. The cover was wrecked, and half the pages had fallen out, so I have no idea who wrote it. The author comes across as somewhat... eccentric. I found it incredibly useful though - especially the flowchart section at the back. I couldn't find any record of the book online, so I took the liberty of transcribing that chapter into digital form. I hope someone finds it useful!\n\n<center>[[Begin|Second Start]]</center>\n\n<center>[[Read "Blue"|https://thepigeonhole.com/books/fable]] | [[Visit Me|http://www.krishancoupland.co.uk/]]</center>

In that case we're looking at an IMP. These critters are often mistaken for GOBLINS... with disastrous effect. While the latter can be kept as pets, I wouldn't recommend even trying to tame an imp. They're evil through and through, and will slit your throat as soon as look at you - particularly if you've bashed it on the head and trapped it in a sack! Best despatch it now before it escapes. Good news though: imps are considred a delicacy in certain regions, so you'll be able to sell the corpse to a dealer for a pretty fair price. Or maybe you'll want to keep it for yourself? If so, I'd recommend it fried up with a little garlic and rosemary. Delicious.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

I'm willing to bet you've gotten hold of a PIXIE (also spelled PIXI, PIGSY or PISKIE). Pixies are generally benign and playful... but don't let their innocent gambolling fool you. They mate like rabbits, and one or two can quickly become an infestation that you'll struggle to control. If found anywhere near your property the safest strategy is to despatch your captive with a quick blow to the head and then seed your garden with bits of cake laced with rat poison.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

It sounds as though you've captured one of the most common little folk around - a GNOME. These subterranean humanoids were first discovered in the 16th century, but they've been a common sight ever since. Essentially worthless, they're harmless too - so it's up to you what you do with it. Some collectors say that they can make fun toys for young children, but I wouldn't recommend it - apart from anything else, they're just not hygeinic. \n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Well, it's one of two things, and it should be pretty easy to tell the difference. Does your little captive:\n\n[[A: Have the feet of a duck?]]\n\nOR\n\n[[B: Vary between human form and that of a pure black horse?]]

Interesting. It might be worth just double-checking very quickly: you haven't kidnapped a very short human, have you? No? Good. Just checking.\n\nObserve it closely now. Watch its behaviour. Try to judge its intent. Is it regarding you with malevolent eyes full of wickedness, or does it look rather more frightened and innocent. Would you say it was...\n\n[[Mischevious?]]\n\n[[Not mischevious?]]

Ugh. A SPRIGGAN. These pesky beasts are mostly found in Cornwall, but in recent years have started to spread. There's precious little to recommend them; they're ugly, troublesome, and they tend to blight crops. If you're dealing with a whole herd of the buggers make sure to turn your clothing inside out before wading in and setting about them with a shovel. Holy water works as well. Oh, and don't let them spit in your eye. Don't ask me why - just grab a pair of goggles. Trust me.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Okay. Well. I don't want to alarm you, but it seems that you may have caught a SELKIE. It's okay. If you just start backing away now you should be okay. That is, assuming you're still reading this, and haven't already been dragged kicking and screaming into the briny deep. For future reference, if it's a tiny human wearing the skin of a seal, leave it well alone! Yes, they're cute. But they'll also quite happily drown you in the surf just for giggles.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Lovely job. You've stumbled across a BOGGART (also known as a BUGBEAR, BOGLE or BOGEYMAN). These beasties are almost always malevolent, and their nastiness ranges from making milk go sour to abducting wandering children. It's your civic duty to do away with it. Yes, I know, not pleasant, but you can't very well let it roam free to prey on anyone not sensible enough to hang a horseshoe on their door. Best way to kill it is to sprinkle it with salt. Failing that though, a big rock ought to do. Chin up. You're doing your good deed for the day.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

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Not human? Eww. Hope it's not too gross. You wore gloves when you handled it, right? I hope you wore gloves.\n\nAnywho, whereabouts did you find this little critter?\n\n[[By a river.]]\n\n[[By the seaside.]]\n\n[[Hawai.]]

Well, with that in mind it's pretty obvious that you've gotten hold of a PYGMAE. The Greeks were the first to encounter this strange, ancient race of little folk; you can read about them in The Iliad. They're said to be pretty comical - that is, unless you're a heron. Pygmae hate herons, and herons hate pygmae. Seriously. Get the two together and watch them fight. Great way to spend an evening.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Well, congratulations! You've captured an ELF. These beings are pretty rare, so give yourself a little pat on the back. Famed for their exceptional beauty, these diminuitive beasts will fetch a good price on the black market. Be careful though: old Scandinavian ballards warn that the dance of the elves can be mesmerising. Watch for what you think is a few minutes and you may wake up to find that years have passed. Don't say you weren't warned!\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

A Primer On The Capture And Identification Of The Little Folk Of Myth And Legend

Well, that narrows it down considerably. One last question - whereabouts did you find the creature?\n\n[[Near a mine or on a ship.]]\n\n[[In an old house, or near a stream / waterfall.]]\n\n[[In, or lurking near, a hole.]]

Well, I must say that I'm impressed you've managed to capture a PUCA (also known as a PWCA, a CROMLECH or a PHOOCA). This shape-shifting spirit most often takes animal form, but no matter how it changes its fur always remains jet black. While it may look pretty terrifying, it's actually generally considered to be benevolent. Go on: untie it and climb onto its back. Brian Boru (High King of Ireland) is supposedly the first and only man ever to ride a puca, but you could be the second!\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Okay, odd question to follow up with, but bear with me here: was it riding a goat or fending off a heron when you found it?\n\n[[Yeah. It was pretty crazy.]]\n\n[[Nah. No goats or herons in sight.]]

Excellent. In that case I'm fairly sure that what you've captured is a LEPRECHAUN. But wait... don't crack open the champagne just yet. The legend about leprechauns owning pots of gold is just that: a legend. Have you ever tried to walk to the end of a rainbow, anyway?\n\nDisappointing, I know. But rumours like that are just the kind of mischief leprechauns tend to enjoy. Best not to let it out. They love fixing shoes though, so why not shove it in the cupboard under the stairs and let it get to work on your walking boots?\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Not to be confused with the much-more-malicious IMP, what you've found is a GOBLIN. Not bad. Not as good as a FAIRY, of course, but not bad. A dealer will give you a decent price, as goblins make good pets - somewhat similar to dogs. If you plan on keeping it yourself, take some time to housetrain the beast. Goblin crap is - let me tell you - a nightmare to clean up.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Well, if it's got round ears and hairy feet then I can say with some certainty that you've taken prisoner a HOBBIT. Discovered by JRR Tolkein in 1937, there little fellows are a peaceable race, and aren't worth all that much to a merchant. They can be mildly entertaining when drunk though, so invite your friends around, ply it with alcohol and get it to wrestle a pot plant.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Right, not a PYGMAE then. There're only a couple of other things it could be at that kind of size. So tell me - is the creature ugly and hairy, or relatively good-looking?\n\n[[Hairy as sin.]]\n\n[[Well-groomed. Not bad to look at.]]

Bleh. Such a shame. As a collector, I'm disappointed. We've ended up in the midst of a whole bunch of little folk that just aren't that great to look at. Never mind, though - just because your find isn't pretty doesn't mean it's not useful. Let's forge onwards, and work out what we're looking at.\n\nI assume you've got your specimen stopped up in a jar or container of some kind. Have a look at it through the glass. Maybe shake it around a bit. Does it look particularly mean or evil?\n\n[[Yes, it looks evil.]]\n\n[[No, ugly as it is, it looks pretty friendly.]]

Krishan Coupland

Lucky you! You've captured a SPRITE. These harmless beasts are often tied to a particular element - earth, air, fire or water. Shift the paving slab off the top of the bucket and take a look - you should be able to tell what kind you've got. Keep it alive by making sure it gets plenty of its base element. It may seem like a lot of trouble to go to (especially if you've nabbed a fire sprite), but it's worth it. Sprites have been known to grant wishes every now and then. They're willful creatures though, so don't expect instant results. Keep it secure, starve it tactically, and keep on wishing! Thank me when you're a millionaire!\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Marvellous - you've captured a FAIRY (also called a FAE or FAERIE). They can be mischevious little shits, fairies can - something to do with their anger at having been displaced from their natural habitat by humans... or some such blather. The important thing is to take care when handling - doubly so as the wings are incredibly valuable. Pluck them off carefully using a pair of blunt tweezers, trying to keep each one intact. The fairy will die soon after having its wings removed, but the body isn't really worth much. Preserve the wings between wax paper and call a local dealer - it's your lucky day!\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Excellent. I hope you've managed to lock it securely in a room, or trap it under a wheelbarrow. Some of these creatures can be dangerous!\n\nAssuming you got a good look at it before you clocked it on the head and stuffed it into a sack, would you say it looked...\n\n[[Human?]]\n\n[[Not human?]]\n\n[[Actually, it keeps changing shape. First it was a horse, and then it was a rabbit. Now it's some kind of dog...]]

Don't be alarmed if your captive seems to have escaped. You've got hold of a KOBOLD, a creature which is capable of becoming invisible or transforming to look like a candle flame. Rest assured it hasn't gone anywhere. These little monsters are generally harmless, but can become malevolent if riled. Either offer it some supper and let it on its way, or chuck it in the garbage crusher. Kobolds are common as muck, and often thought of more as pests than anything else. Don't bother taking it to a dealer - you'll only be laughed at for your trouble.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

In that case you've discovered a LAMIA. These beautiful beasts spend most of their time lounging in rivers, combing their long golden hair. There are reports of them charming menfolk, but I personally have always been put off by the duck feet. Maybe I'm just shallow. There's no reason to keep a lamia captive, so you'll probably want to release it back into the wild. There are stories about them carrying golden combs though, so make sure to frisk it for valuables before you do.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Interesting. Take a closer peek - but make sure you don't let it escape when you do! Which of the below would you say best describes its appearance?\n\n[[Swarthy. Knobbly. Bulbous.]]\n\n[[Mostly human.]]\n\n[[Ghostly. Transparent.]]

How cute! Bear in mind that creatures this small are often pretty fragile. Make sure it's got access to food and water, won't you? It'd be a shame to kill the little blighter before you knew if it was valuable or not.\n\nNow, this new acquisition of yours - does it have wings?\n\n[[Yes.]]\n\n[[No.]]

Well, well, well. Not a FAIRY then, but we are getting closer to having a positive ID. The next question is a bit of a subjective one, but I've found it's usually not that difficult to tell. Watch it for a while. Note its behaviour. Is it trying to escape? Is it muttering threats, baring its teeth or hissing under its breath? Or is it rather more playful and giggly? In short, is it nice or nasty?\n\n[[It's delightful.]]\n\n[[It's unpleasant as an angry llama.]]\n

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Ah, well then your specimen simply must be a DWARF. You're probably wondering why it doesn't have a beard, carry an axe, mine for gold or drink copiously. There's not another breed of little folk that's quite so steeped in stereotype as the dwarf. Really they're simple, peaceable creatures, who would never dream of hurting another living thing. Their teeth are quite valuable though, so pop it in the mouth and gather up a handful of white gold before sending it on its way.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Often found on the Orkney and Shetland Islands, the creature you're looking at is undoubtedly a TROW (also known as a DROW or TROLL). They're often described as ugly, but I don't think they're too bad to look at - certainly not when you consider some of their contemporaries! Anywho, looks aside, they're a dab hand with a fiddle. Get it access to an instrument (and offer some encouragment in the form of a few jabs from a cattle prod) and you'll have live music at your next house party or family function. Make sure to keep it chained up though; if given free reign they tend to try and drink human blood!\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]

Well that's a shame. Pointy ears would have meant you'd hit the jackpot. Never mind though. On we go. Does it happen to have hairy feet?\n\n[[Yep. Totally hairy.]]\n\n[[Nope. Hair-free feet.]]

Ah, a KELPIE (sometimes called a TANGIE, a CEFFYL DWR, a NECK, A NIXIE or a BACKAHAST). These water spirits are said to have the ability to shape-shift, varying between human form and that of a pure black horse. Fair warning: they often drag people into the river in which they live, consume them, and then spit their entrails onto the bank. If you see a lot of entrails scattered about... worry.\n\n[[Identify another tiny humanoid.|Second Start]]\n\n[[Quit.|Start]]